How to Grow through Hard Times


fern and plants photo with text that says How to Grow through Hard Times

You might have seen the quote "Grow through what you go through". If that is a direct quote I can't find who said it but I think that it might be a variation on the quote "Don't go through life, grow through life" by Eric Butterworth. As a quote it sounds cool and it seems inspirational, but how do you actually grow through what you go through? Here's how I think you do it, especially if you have mental health issues and/or chronic illness(es): I think that you have to accept what you can't change and change what you can.

Before you start to accept what you can't change you need to know that it might take a long time to fully accept it. Especially if you just got some kind of new illness it will probably take a lot of time to accept. Even after you are mostly used to it and at least okay with it most of the time you might have some days where you just hate it and it upsets you. That is okay! Accepting it doesn't mean you'll always be fine with it. Never put yourself down because you feel like you aren't accepting it as soon as you should or for having some days where it's more difficult to handle. In the process of accepting something I can't change I find it helpful to find the positive in the situation and focus on that and to find the lesson in the situation and work to apply that lesson to my life in the future. If you can't find the positive or find the lesson in your situation you might find it helpful to read my post Lessons from my Chronic Illness. If you still can't find the positive or find the lesson try not to worry about it. It's not necessary to find the positive or find the lesson; it just might be helpful to the acceptance process if you can.

When you start to change the things that you can change, whether you have illnesses or not, it's easiest to start slow, do a little bit at a time, and take breaks. Just like when you set a goal you want to break it down into smaller and more manageable pieces. Especially if you're changing a big thing like trying to establish a new habit you need to know it will take a lot of time. You should always ask for help when you need it. Never put yourself down for needing help. It's great that you recognize your need for help! After you do ask for help make sure to celebrate that in some way. You should always congratulate yourself for doing difficult things and celebrate your small victories.

Especially if you are going through a lot of difficult things, like maybe dealing with a chronic illness and mental illness, it's going to be helpful to be able to grow through that you go through. I know that I always want to grow as a person and be the best version of myself possible. Two of the ways I do that are by accepting what I can't change and changing what I can.